June 1, 2004
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Memorial Day Edition
May 31, 2004 (so we’re a little late… we’re sure it’s still May 31st SOMEwhere in the world)
Dramamine Boy Turns Self In
Xangaland – Missing Xanga blogger Dramamine Boy, being sought for bedding infractions, turned himself in to the authorities earlier today, ending a ten week manhunt. However, Dramamine Boy was not arrested, but instead met with investigators and released.
Later, it was learned that a deal had been struck. According to unnamed sources, the charge of pillow tag tampering had been dropped in exchange for supplying witnesses for the prosecution in the Michael Jackson child molestation trial.
A spokesman for the International Bed and Pillow Police stated, “This is a heinous miscarriage of justice! We’re unable to prosecute this law-breaker just because he’s able to aid in some trivial case against that Thriller guy? Bed and Pillow crimes have been overlooked by the courts time and time again. Why hasn’t my suggestion of installing the death penalty for abusing beds and pillows been approved yet!?! WHERE’S THE JUSTICE!?!”
When approached with the news of Dramamine Boy being cleared of all charges, the founders of Xanga.com released the following statement:
“Who?”
Dramamine Boy quickly left the police station without comment. The spokesman for Dramamine Boy’s Xanga was unavailable for comment as well, however, a Xanga Times reporter later spotted him panhandling at the end of a freeway off-ramp, with the sign, “Will work for new tiger”.
In Other Super-Cool News
Dramamine Boy Spanked by Sydney_Chickie! - Canadian maple extremely sturdy, butt still sore
Dramamine Boy wins SuuGaPuFF’s Contest! - …by cheating
Ting2 is Dramamine Boy’s Xanga’s 200th Subscriber! - Elaborate parade planned… um… some day
Well, I sure am glad that ordeal is over with. Where has Dramamine Boy been all this time, you ask? Well, I’d love to tell you, but if there ends up being another reason to go into hiding, I’d have to find new hiding places. And as you people know, good hiding places are hard to find (this link will eventually go to a future Dramamine Boy’s Xanga blog that has yet to be written. When I write the blog, it will explain what I mean about “hiding places are hard to find” and I’ll come back and complete the link, so future people that read this will be able to TRAVEL TO THE FUTURE!!… well, sorta. Instead of usual, boring internet links that refer to current or past webpages, this link will take you to a future webpage! Just another cool feature of Dramamine Boy’s Xanga! Until I write that blog, however, it’s just confusing).
Alright… go go Gadget blog!
Good lord… I’ve waited as long as I could wait. The clock has struck midnight and a new month has arrived. But this is no ordinary flip of the calendar. Does anyone happen to know what month just passed!?!
And yes, I’m aware it was May… but that’s not what I’m talkin’ about. Why, it was Asian Pacific American Heritage Month!
200+ websites and this crappy, blurry image was the only poster I could find
That’s right, baby, we got our own month! Take that, all you non-Pacific Asians (I’m not sure what asians are non-Pacific asians, but whatever)! But here it is, the end of May and I wouldn’t even have known it was Asian Pacific American Heritage Month if I didn’t happen to look it up on the web!
What’s the deal here? If you turn on BET at any time in February, there’ll be a show or special or something on about Black History Month. The History Channel celebrates Black History Month as well, broadcasting numerous biographies on influential black historical figures. ESPN runs commercials throughout February glorifying great black athletes of the past.
So what about the asians!?! I’ve been watching ESPN all month and how many tributes to Rex Walters have I seen? ZERO!! Heck, I just looked through BET’s website and they didn’t even show Better Luck Tomorrow ONCE this month on Black Star Power Cinema!?!
Where’s the TV exposure? Where are the touching stories on the local news regarding our ancestors and their contributions to this country? Where are the parades and other celebrations? WHERE ARE THE GODZILLA MARATHONS!?!
Doggone asian pacific discrimination, I tell you.
So, I turned on the TV, looking for some station that would honor Asian Pacific American Heritage Month. I started where everyone would start when looking for this type of news… VH-1. I watched a whole month of VH-1 and there was not one mention of Asian Pacific American Heritage Month! How hard would it have been to do one special program about asians? Where’s VH-1′s list of the 100 Greatest Asian Rappers? I mean, seriously, I’d really like to see that list, cuz I think if I practiced, I could make that one.
I’ve never heard one of Jin’s songs, but I’m gonna take a wild guess and say he’d be on that list
So be warned, VH-1! You blew it this year, so you better make things right next year or I just might start boycotting! Next May, I better see a whole month full of asian programs! Not only the aforementioned Asian Rapper list, but quality programming such as…
Heck, I can’t just pin it on VH-1, tho’. There’s a crapload of stations on cable and NONE of them ran ONE program to commemorate Asian Pacific American Heritage Month!?! Doggone it, I just might start boycotting TV altogether if they don’t get their acts together next year. Here’s some other programs I’m looking forward to…
Hello Fox Sports Net? Can you shut Tom Arnold up long enough to show…
I mean, Yuta’s accomplished so much already in the world of basketball, this episode should’ve been made already, whether it’s Asian Pacific American Heritage Month or not! If they can make an episode about Daunte Culpepper and his penchant for throwing interceptions and mis-reading receiver routes and coverages, then they can make an episode about Yuta leading his team to the ABA championship!
Not only should ESPN be running vignettes on all of their networks about the great pacific asian american athletes during every commercial break, but they should also go the extra step and play old games on ESPN Classic featuring pacific asian athletes. For example, in February, they showed baseball games that Jackie Robinson played in… how about showing a few Lenn Sakata games in May? They could show like… every game that he ever hit a home run. Heck, he only hit 25 of ‘em in his career, it shouldn’t be too tough to replay them all in one month.
Where the heck is A&E? Do they feel that there aren’t any prominent asians in the arts and entertainment industry!?! They can’t come out with…
Sulu! How can they create this Biography show and not do one about the first asian in space!?! Come on, just think of all the cool stuff they could cover in this episode. They could talk about all of Sulu’s cool lines, such as, “Captain… look!” and “Warp factor two, aye”. They could do a half an hour just talking to Sulu about the episode where he went nuts, took off his shirt and ran around the ship looking to stab people in the knees with a fencing foil!
I see you are wearing knee pads… not fair!
Sulu could talk about being promoted to captain and his secret relationship with Chekov and stuff like that. I’m tellin’ ya, THAT’S RIVETING TELEVISION ENTERTAINMENT!
Sulu looking just a lit-tle too happy for my taste
At the very least, can’t we see this next May!?!
And it’ll give me a chance to dress up
GET TO WORK, TV EXECUTIVES! THE CLOCK IS TICKING!
Man, I can’t wait until next May. TV is gonna be SO COOL! I guess I better start practicing now…
I said a hip hop the hippie to the hippie
the hip hip hop, a you dont stop
Comments (27)
so long!?!?!? argh i have to come back tomorrow and finish this up. ahha
omg, that last pic actually made me laugh out loud. and i think that Asian Pacific month gets NO love. i wonder how long we’ve had a month and didn’t even know it. i grew up knowing about Afro-American month and Hispanic American month. Hmm….as for non Asian Pacific…….. could that be India since their water is called the Indian Sea instead of the Pacific? And what about Russia and Mongolia, I don’t think they have any Pacific shoreline. I’m glad to see your post. They are so far and few. Is this your strategy for building up our anticipation until we can’t stand it any longer and then bustin’ loose with a great post with cool pics? good plan.
jin the mc’s got a xanga, but you have to ask cowboy for the link.
LMAO
remember, when u become a popular tv personality and get a high-class cliché rap video you will have to mention the beloved Assy here. i think it may go with the territory. …also… is there an Arab-American-Middle-Eastern Month? Probably a fake month like… Decebuaranuary.
i can’t decide which i enjoy more: the text or the pictures. especially the last one.
so when you do get on james lipton’s “inside the bloggers’ studio” — how will you answer the infamous questions from bernard pivot, esp. “what’s your favorite curse word?” will it be “doggone?” >P
oooh… i want to take the dram da mc home with me
Dang, all pimped out! WASSUP?
::cracks up:: That last picture is PRICELESS! XD Dram, you are a Photoshop GOD! How do you do it?
hehehehehe I love the “Inside the Bloggers Studio” I wish I could be on it but I don’t think I do enough quality type of blogging like you to be asked. Oh well I can live vicariously through you.
Hehe. You cracks me up. Tho the kid at the end is hot.
It’s the Atlantic Asians I feel sorry for.
(There must be at least a few Asians in Atlanta)
You are the king of photoshop, I agree! man, that last pic looked REAL! Except for the Major League Baseball cap. Everyone knows there’s no such thing.
Oh my freaking gosh.
dude VH1 does hecka black history month stuff too…what a ripoff. Thanks for exposing this obvious void in television programming. Gotta RECCANIZE! (recognise…if you can’t read ghetto).
Sulu rocks…
AHhaAHaH its 20 cent! dram you’re hilarious.
again, just another example of the asian man getting brought down. what about our good friend “data” from goonies? will he be remembered only for his booby traps? where is the justice?!
Hey, theres not even a Caucasian, or Anglo-American, or whatever white people month. so just be happy you have a month, because if i had one it would be RACIST!
That is a ripoff, we don’t even celebrate our Asian-Pacifics month in skool, but we celebrate black history. They need to have APET (Asian Pacific Entertainment Television).
I swear…you look like my brother when he was little. Maybe all Asians look the same when they’re young lol.
As for Asians that aren’t Pacfiic, how about western Russians and uhhh Afghanis?
hahahah youre back yayyy!!! HAPPY PACIFIC ASIAN APPRECIATION MONTH!!
may is definitely the best month ever cuz it’s my birth month too! wee! hehehe i <3 azngangsters lolol
holla.
May is Pacific Asian Month??? HOW COME I DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THIS?!?! Eeeesh.
That picture of you and James Lipton cracked me up….whenever I see James Lipton these days, I think of SNL’s James Lipton…great stuff.
OMG! gahahaha… you do crack me up. so much photoshop-goodness in this blog. And a prop-up for Israel! woohoo. I love his version of over the rainbow!
hugS.
you make me laugh.
well, at first we wanted an anime theme like akira, then he started drawing and we were talking about Ninja stuff, i’m supposed to be drawing in the thing cause i told the guy i wanted to be an artist at one point in my life. BUT you’re right he drew all the white people and black people with BIG beautiful eyes and nice full lashes, but me i’ve got cat eyes? i think i’m going to scan everyone’s caricature i’ll post them up later.
blondless - Well, I think the next couple of blogs are gonna be shorter, so you’ll be able to read and comment at 2am.
justabum - Yeahhhhh… that’s what it is… strategy.
Actually, I get a lack of motivation/ideas to finish a blog, so sometimes, they take awhile to be completed.
silvermyst_ashke - Yeah, I made a link to his Xanga from the picture, but since nobody saw it, I put the link where his name appears now.
lorien_marene -
AssAssAssain29 - Hahahaha… we’ll split all the profits that my rap career generates!
blacksesame - Yeah, that last pic came out a lot better than I thought it was gonna.
tjthunderball - Hahahaha… yeah, it’s either gonna be that or “crap”.
petitekiu - For a small fee, I’m sure that can be arranged!
cherwhoah - I’m reprezentin’, yo!… or something like that.
lilchinadoll341 - How do I do it? Well, that might have to be a subject of a future Dramamine Boy’s Xanga blog!
astrohooker - I think that program would be pretty doggone interesting for some bloggers! Sorta like a DVD-extras blog… hmmm, what an ingenious concept that is.
Queen_Hera - If only my parents had the foresight to dress me like that!
arnie_flangehead - There was probably a few asians on Atlantis… I feel REALLY sorry for them!
cowboybone - Yeah, I liked how that last one came out, too.
SaltedLemons - Thanks, you saved me the trouble of breakin’ out my Ghetto to English dictionary.
vecspeed12 - HAHAHAHA… “20 cent”
ramen_rider - Don’t forget his touching portrayal as Short Round from Indiana Jones!
halfton81 - That’s cuz EVERY month is caucasian month!
rebus_clue - Hmmmm, could be… I thought western Russia was part of Europe, but middle Russia might be Asia. There’s no sight of the Pacific from middle Russia.
Bloodberry - Asian Pacific American Heritage Month AND a birthday? How can you stand the happiness!?!
drphilmd - Word to ya motha.
CindyWang - Hahaha… yup, that’s the first thing that comes to my mind too!
sydney_chickie - Hahaha… yeah, I was laughing to myself as I was typing that comment.
Hahaha, nice comment there. They Used To Not Be Able To Do That On Television might have been better, but they would have had to say that everytime they couldn’t do something because You Can’t Do That On Television.
But it was awesome to see that again.