October 27, 2003

• Dramamine Boy’s Xanga is rapidly approaching a milestone and we’re celebrating by giving away a prize!

  
  

  That’s right, Dramamine Boy’s Xanga will soon host its’ 10,000th visitor!  What better way to commemorate this momentous event in Dramamine Boy’s Xanga history than to give away stuff!

  
  

  Now, while other websites give away crappy or even imaginary prizes, such things do not happen here at Dramamine Boy’s Xanga!  First was a cookie.  Then, it was

  
  

  F R E E M O N E Y  !

  
  

  We got nothin’ but quality stuff here, baby!

  
  

  First off, to see if you qualify for the 10,000th visitor prize, follow these directions:

  
  

  
  
  • Check the bottom of the page to see if you’re visitor #10,000.
    
  • Take a screenshot of the page with the counter reading 10,000 and e-mail it to me.
    
  • Probably a good idea to e-mail your full name and address, too, since I’m not psychic.

  
  

  Now, on to the prize.  Dram has been collecting sports cards since age 6, when his grandma would give him and his brother baseball cards.  Being the dental-conscious person that he is, Dram would trade the bubble gum from his packs for the cards from his brother’s packs.  Eons later, long after the sweet flavor of those rectangular, semi-petrified slabs of gum evaporated (actually, baseball card gum flavor lasted about 8 seconds anyway), Dram still has those precious cards from his youth!

  
  

  And now, Dram has hand-selected the following gems from his extensive collection and is passing them on to you, lucky visitor #10,000!

  
  

  If you’re the magical winner, you’ll receive…

  
  

  

  
  

  The famous Dick Trickle!  According to his website, Dick is America’s Winningest Stock Car Driver!  How they were able to substantiate that claim, I don’t know.  I mean, I won many a race in my basement with my Trans Am Hot Wheels car, so he musta won an awful lot of races to beat my record.  We’ll give him the benefit of the doubt and concede the “Winningest Stock Car Driver” title to him, so he has something to cling on to… as fake of a title as that may be.

  
  

  You also get…

  
  

  

  
  

  You’ll receive a Harry Colon!  While working in a sports card shop, I’ve noticed a lot of trends.  They say that sports card collecting is a male-dominated hobby.  I guess a sure sign of that is that a lot more males have a Harry Colon than females.  It just warms my heart when a kid walks into the shop and states, “I WANT A HARRY COLON!”.

  
  

  But wait!  There’s more!

  
  

  

  
  

  Another Dick!  Yes, he’s a sentimental favorite of mine, since he was always picked on throughout his life.  Not sure why… maybe it was that jacked-up hairdo.  I mean, a white man with an afro… what was the thought process that came up with THAT!?!

  
  

  Also included is…

  
  

  

  
  

  Yes, you get a Boobie!  Yes, I’m pretty proud of my Boobies and I’m pretty reluctant to give one up.  But, since this is a special occasion, sacrifices must be made.  I know you wish that I could give you two Boobies, but alas, that I can not do.  Heck, I’m sure you’re pretty shocked that I had any Boobies at all.

  
  

  Yes, I know… just getting those cards above would be MORE than enough of a prize.  But as insane as it sounds, WE’RE NOT FINISHED YET!

  
  

  

  
  

  I believe Pete is french, but I’m not sure.  I didn’t take French in high school, so I’m pretty clueless to give you an accurate translation of his last name.  Oh well, I’m sure someone can research that for the winner.

  
  

  And last, but certainly not least, is…

  
  

  

  
  

  Yes, the immortal Rusty Kuntz!  He played seven seasons in the big leagues and was a member of the 1984 World Champion Detroit Tigers.  But he was best known for his often-stated phrase, “IT’S PRONOUNCED ‘KOONTZ’, YOU MORON!”.

  
  

  Sophomoric humor.  Tee hee hee.

  
  
  So there ya have it.  Click away and see if you’re the lucky winner!  Whether you’re the 10,000th visitor or not, I appreciate each one of you stopping by and reading this madness and thanks a ton for all the comments.  Hopefully, one of these goofy blogs I’ve written has helped brighten up a dreary day.
  
  

  

  
  

  (this card not included… unless I figure out a way to create this outside of Photoshop)

  
  

  Boy, I sure hope I’m not visitor #10,000… that would kinda suck.

  • 7:03 am
  • 33 Comments